beginnings and blessings

I feel compelled to write. It but the voice in my head into pen. It has been years since I have blogged but feel it is where I need to begin again. Where I can find me, the new me, the change I seek.

I am a wife to a wonderful husband whom I have been married to for over 3 years. God has given us quite the roller coaster the first few years of our marriage but we are stronger people because of it and our marriage is stronger for it. We are not perfect but we laugh, we tease, we sing (off key mostly), we grow, we love. And for those things I am grateful.

This past January we welcomed our first daughter into the world, a little girl, Madison Rose. I love her. She makes my heart so happy. As a friend of mine put it, being a mother is the best vocation in the world. Some days present challenges, but for the most part the last 4 months have been blissful. She sleeps well, eats well, and is a joy to watch grow. Her newest "trick" is grabbing her toes and rolling to the side. She makes me melt. I am a NICU nurse. I finally feel that I have found my niche. I love the babies and the families. I love the growth outside of the womb as the little babies learn to conquer the world. If I ever need a lesson on strength I just need to look at them.

And lastly what truly is the reason that I need to write and find an outlet for my thoughts...I have multiple sclerosis. My MS battle started in May 2011 shortly after Troy and I were married. I am thankful that I have had a relatively benign course. The first summer living through it and getting a diagnosis was the worst. But since then has been bearable. My pregnancy was great and symptom free. And the past winter has been relatively symptom free except for the first few weeks after Madison was born. Now that the heat is starting to creep back into the days my left side is a little more heavy, a little more tingley, a little more annoying. I am so sad to have to wean breastfeeding in order to start back on Copaxone. I wish it could be some other way. But the reality is that I need to start back on my medication before the true heat of summer starts up. (What a pain in the butt or a pain in the forearm at the moment...)

But really this blog is a place for me to talk about how I am coping with my MS. How I am coping with being a mama. And to share to joy of this life I am blessed to live.